Battlefield Earth (2000) No stars out of 4. Starring John Travolta, Barry Pepper, Forest Whitaker, Kim Coates and Richard Tyson. Screenplay by Corey Mandell and JD Shapiro. Based on the novel by L. Ron Hubbard. Directed by Roger Christian.

OK, bear with me now. Here's my theory. "Battlefield Earth" was meant to be "The Producers" of the science fiction genre.
You remember "The Producers," don't you? Mel Brooks comedy about two men (Zero Mostel and Gene Wilder) who decide to make a fortune by producing the worst play ever written. They sell about 1,000 percent of the play to various investors because they believe it will close after one night and they can just keep the money.

They hire the worst director and cast the most inept actors. But something goes wrong and the play becomes a hit. Thus Mostel and Wilder go to jail for embezzlement.

So, how does this relate to "Battlefield Earth." Well, John Travolta, who is listed as one of the film's producers, seems to have taken the opposite tact. He hired whom he believed were the best actors - himself included - as well as the strongest writers to adapt L. Ron Hubbard's massive novel and the correct director to helm the opus.

Well "Battlefield Earth" is no "Springtime for Hitler." If only Travolta and company had played "Battlefield Earth" as a send-up, a parody, a satire, anything but a straight, dramatic vehicle. If they had just been able to put their tongues in their cheeks and say, "Come on, folks. We're having a great time kidding around."

Maybe some blooper outtakes during the closing credits. Anything.
Unfortunately, "Battlefield Earth" take itself seriously, way too seriously. And because of that, it is one of the most wretched, embarrassing and clumsy features ever put on celluloid.

It is a movie that makes you cringe and chuckle simultaneously. You sit in disbelief as this lumbering behemoth staggers along. You watch in amazement as Travolta gives the worst performance of his career.

And you wonder: What was he thinking? Could his passion for the novel so overwhelmed his sense of judgment that he would allow himself to be ridiculed in such a manner?

Compared to Travolta, Kevin Costner's turns in "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves," "Waterworld" and "The Postman" and nearly Shakespearean.

Travolta goes through the film spewing inane dialogue and laughing like a straight-jacketed man in a padded cell. The laugh is neither menacing nor evil, merely obnoxious.

Most every line in "Battlefield Earth" is spoken with an exclamation point. Every plot turn and revelation is punctuated with Elia Cmiral's overwrought music.

There is no point dissing the cast members. Most of them have done fine work in previous films. And every actor is entitled to his "Parnell." (Clark Gable fans will understand the reference.)

The plot is ridiculous, The action - even by s-f standards - beyond belief. Humans, reduced to almost caveman-like existence, teach themselves to fly sophisticated fighter jets in a week. Not to mention the jets and their payload of weapons are in perfect condition after 1,000 years of inattention.
At least give the audience some credit for having brains.

There is really no need to go on. "Battlefield Earth" is a major blunder. It will go down in history with such infamous titles as "Bonfire of the Vanities" and "Showgirls."

However, to be fair. "Battlefield Earth" can have one positive purpose. It can be used by film schools as a teaching lesson. It can stand as the quintessential example of big moviemaking ineptitude.

Bob Bloom is the film critic at the Journal and Courier in Lafayette, IN. He can be reached by e-mail at bloom@journal-courier.com or at bobbloom@iquest.net. Bloom also is an associate member of the Online Film Critics Society. His reviews can be found at the Internet Movie Database Web site: http://www.imdb.com/M/reviews_by?Bob+Bloom

The review above was posted to the rec.arts.movies.reviews newsgroup (de.rec.film.kritiken for German reviews).